Jem felt that his own character had been attainted; and that to many
it might still appear suspicious. He knew that he could convince
the world, by a future as blameless as his past had been, that he
was innocent. But at the same time he saw that he must have
patience, and nerve himself for some trials; and the sooner these
were undergone, the sooner he was aware of the place he held in
men's estimation, the better. He longed to have presented himself
once more at the foundry; and then the reality would drive away the
pictures that would (unbidden) come of a shunned man, eyed askance
by all, and driven forth to shape out some new career.
I said every reason "but one" inclined Jem to hasten Mary's return
as soon as she was sufficiently convalescent. That one was the
meeting which awaited her at home.
Turn it over as Jem would, he could not decide what was the best
course to pursue. He could compel himself to any line of conduct
that his reason and his sense of right told him to be desirable; but
they did not tell him it was desirable to speak to Mary, in her
tender state of mind and body, of her father.
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